God is real., Grieving Still

The beginning of a million (seven) questions from me.

For Part 1, please read HERE.

  1. God is real. I begged and begged and pleaded with Him to dream about her right after she died just so I could still feel some kind of closeness to her. It never happened. So why now?
  2. Why were we at my house? Why not her house?
  3. Why is she always in a rocking chair? What’s up with that?!
  4. Why is she smiling? Not to say my grandma was a scowler, but the majority of her expressions were NOT smiles.
  5. Is she still watching over me? Is that why I’m on the ground?
  6. Why was I so blunt with my thought to myself: Marrissa — your grandmother is dead. Why did I have to say it like that?
  7. WHY NOW???

This weekend, I laid out a master plan to set up a nonprofit organization that teaches young people about art and media careers, as an enrichment to the standard public/private school, curriculum. When I realized I needed a name for such a venture, the first that came to mind was,  “Your Oyster, Inc.”

When I was a kid, my grandmother would always tell me the world was my oyster. And the moment I decided to start a nonprofit and name it for her, then I suddenly have a dream about her? Is that why she’s back?

To encourage me?

Well thank God because I am SO nervous about this thing. I mean seriously, God? First Taste and See, with a full time job, writing magazine articles, maintaining 2 blogs, co-publishing a comic book, conceptualizing multiple novels AND a nonprofit on top of all that?

I guess He’s preparing my testimony. Gotta admit, though. I’m still a little nervous.

Grandma and me

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One thought on “The beginning of a million (seven) questions from me.

  1. Pingback: Last night I had the most vivid dream about my grandmother. | MARRISSA PATTERSON

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